Not all men have it in them to talk to women, push themselves out of their comfort zones, and make the move they've been dying to make. And believe me, there are plenty of men out there looking for a woman to do just that. But he definitely will give you a sincere compliment on occasion. This is not to say that shy guys should just transform into confident, outgoing men. There are plenty of women out there who like the shy guy. They like the idea of helping a man break out of his shell. Whatever it is you've discarded or added, he's likely to make a comment on it. Of course, he may not compliment you as often as he'd like.
We've picked up a lot of habits (some bad and some good), but you're not about to change them. He talks about how in the “battle of the sexes,” awkward shy guys damn sure don’t feel “privileged.” How he, in particular, was plagued with guilt and fear over approaching women, constantly self-castigating over the possibility that he was a sexual harasser or a rapist, to the point where he asked a therapist about the possibility of chemical castration.He talks of reading Andrea Dworkin and other radical feminists who make him feel, as a man, like a monster. Although I was never as bad off as Scott Aaronson I’ve felt a lot of those feelings and, more importantly, I’ve known my share of guys who were that bad off.There’s no one more resistant to being empathized with or more prone to call attempts to do so “patronizing” than the bitter lonely guy, especially when women try to do it but even when other nerdy guys try to reach out. Nerdlove and the founders of the Good Men Project spend huge chunks of their lives trying to help nerdy guys, but still get regularly blasted with extreme vitriol as “feminist SJWs” by said nerdy guys.I’ve tried to write sympathetically about this stuff in the past: the guilt, the shame, the constant feelings of inadequacy.